Here at the WTF we are contacted by parents all the time who have the same complaint about their tennis playing child:
“Why is my kid not a tennis superstar? – I have spent 10 years taking them to tennis matches all over the country – I have spent a fortune on tennis lessons – but still they are useless – tell me what went wrong.”
To find the true answer to this problem, the WTF undertook extensive research by asking over 26 million children who have played tennis over the past 150 years – Why are you useless at tennis despite having had loads of opportunity and your parents spending loads of money on you?
The results were pretty much as expected:
- 71% had no tennis ability
- 43% really hated tennis
- 64% of girls actually wanted to learn ballet
- 34% of boys only played tennis to smash tennis balls out of the court
but the factor that came in at number one with 100% was
- your child actually is useless
So if you are one of those parents that has wasted a load of money and time, hoping your child would one day become a tennis superstar – the WTF advises you to put it down to experience, go in a dark room, have a drink – and thank your lucky stars you did not waste the same amount of money and time on your second child.